Corn (an acrostic poem)

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Crispy fluffy white popped kernels pour out of the kettle

Obscene amounts of liquid butter soon flow over the alabaster landscape slightly seasoned with salt

Releasing that signature smell in the air that screams movie time

Now for the show that is me consuming of this mountain of magnificence

Grade (an acrostic poem)

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Giving worth to mastery of knowledge

Receiving a letter to honor that feat

Allows the recipient to show others their level of competence of the subject

Despite lack of proof otherwise

Expecting you to accept their expertise

Range (an acrostic poem)

Image: whatstheaction.files.wordpress.com/2015/08/buzzer1.jpg

Risking it all on a forty-footer

And as the basketball left her hand, the clocks went to all zeroes

Now it was now all physics, the skill was already committed

Google clutch, and it would show this shot if it goes in

Everyone waited seemingly forever as the ball bounced on the rim once, twice…

Pass (an acrostic poem)

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Persevering when times get tough is necessary to succeed.

And everyone knows, doing the same thing and expecting different results is insanity.

So, does that mean to be successful you need to be more than a bit touched?

See, it’s leaps in logic like that that show how I almost failed philosophy class.

Help (an acrostic poem)

Image: marlacummins.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/help.jpg

Heroes wielding swords and rescuing damsels in distress were in short supply at Walmart so…

Emily decided that it was time for her to grab her own murder instrument and show the world

Life and society thought she didn’t have what it took to get things done, that she needed a savior

Perhaps they should have thought twice before she began her rampage.  Now those idiots needed…

Certify (an acrostic conversation)

Can you show me for sure who you claim to be?”

Even a DNA test wouldn’t be good enough for the likes of you.”

Really that would be a great first step.”

That was supposed to be a joke.”

It was?  Security is no laughing matter.”

For goodness sake, just let me have the stupid WiFi password”

You can have it when I have at least twelve forms of photographic ID.”

 

Image: lorellasprings.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2016/06/20150824_no_wifi_icon_500.jpg

Clippy (Spenserian Sonnet Style)

Clippy was my dearest friend

As I worked upon my book

He always had advice to send

As I wrote my gobbledygook

 

Every day I would see him look

As the words would begin to flow

He would always give his outlook

On how my formatting should go

 

But then one day he wanted to show

A way to format the entire thing

He had me select my manifesto

All with one gigantic swing

 

I blame my friend Clippy, and not the hard booze

For now there was nothing left of my dance with my muse

 

Image: upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/db/Clippy-letter.PNG