Filling his hotdog bun with condiments,
Randy showed his date his brilliant idea.
“As you can see, put all the stuff underneath, lubricating sides and bottom
Now you can’t drop anything out once you slip your wiener in,” he said.
“Know what? This date is over,” she replied as she stomped off.
She left him holding his meatless bun.
Putting together yet another try was one of the most satisfying things he did
Reaching down he snapped in the last fitting and took a breath, ready to see if it worked
Of course, building all these iterations was also one of the worst things he could do
They reminded him of the numerous failures he didn’t plan for, that he was a bad engineer
Only he knew there was almost zero chance that the first one would work out of the box
That was the stuff of myths, legends, and dumb luck
Yearning to know if this was the one, he flipped the on switch
Prepared for sparks to fly and flames to claim one more attempt
Except this time it didn’t burn. It still didn’t work, but that was still progress?
Determined to go to bed sooner
Enabling a more refreshing start to the week
Fumbling through the stuff that had to be done
Everything taking so much more time to do
And some of it didn’t work out at all
Then the clock read 2 a.m. and he had to admit…
“Stuff like this yarn makes the entire universe.”
“That is total bull and you know it!”
“Really? And what makes you such an expert, do you do physics?”
“I know something much better than physics that tells me that’s a lie.”
“Never going to believe you, but why don’t you tell me.”
“Given that cats exist, and if the universe is made of yarn stuff, why haven’t cats unraveled everything?”
“So you know what, you may be on to something.”
So much of the white stuff littered the ground that
No trace of anything else was in view
Obscuring the need to go anywhere else
While consuming hours moving it from one place to another
So, obviously I have not been posting that much to my blog lately
Oh believe me, I wanted to keep publishing every day, but I had my reasons
Reason one, my professional life has demanded more of my time
Reason two, I needed to get a bunch of stuff done around my house
Yet the time is coming where I will return. Thank you, and please keep checking in
Couldn’t start her morning without the stuff
Everyday was a bowl or two of sugary goodness
Really it was also a bowl for lunch, and maybe one for a late night snack
Eventually she realized she was an addict
And tried to quit cold turkey, but that didn’t end well
Locked up after freebasing all the Captain Crunch at Walmart
Lifting a scoop of earth.
And smelling the damp dark soil.
Nothing Is quite like it in the world. It recharges the soul.
Doing the same with this white stuff? Yeah, not that.
Really need to get a bigger apartment
Or get rid of half of the stuff
Okay, maybe three quarters of it all
Maybe the apartment isn’t the problem
“Focus on the cornucopia of sweetness in front of you”
“Really dude? It’s like oranges, bananas, and like coconuts.”
“Unless you learn to see the totality of sweet vitamins and minerals you will be lost in carbs”
“Isn’t that stuff loaded with carbs? Like, that’s why it’s sweet, dude.”
“That may be true. Can I interest you in a zucchini?”
“Stay far away from me with that thing. You might poke an eye out.”