Can’t make it hot enough to please him
He scarfs down whole scotch bonnets for breakfast
I even saw him puree ghost peppers and drink it as a smoothie
Last Superbowl was the topper. The con carne concoction he brought was pure chemical warfare
Leaving us all to stare in awe and fear as he ate the whole thing without a single sniffle
It did come to no surprise that his intestines eventually got their revenge for his war crimes.
“Last thing I plan on doing is dying”
“I guess it’s a a way to live your life, but it’s sort of weird though.”
“Nah. Everyone should live that way. Now that you know my master plan, what is yours?”
“Everything I can do to help you achieve your end goal.”
Persevering when times get tough is necessary to succeed.
And everyone knows, doing the same thing and expecting different results is insanity.
So, does that mean to be successful you need to be more than a bit touched?
See, it’s leaps in logic like that that show how I almost failed philosophy class.
“Focus on the cornucopia of sweetness in front of you”
“Really dude? It’s like oranges, bananas, and like coconuts.”
“Unless you learn to see the totality of sweet vitamins and minerals you will be lost in carbs”
“Isn’t that stuff loaded with carbs? Like, that’s why it’s sweet, dude.”
“That may be true. Can I interest you in a zucchini?”
“Stay far away from me with that thing. You might poke an eye out.”
Couldn’t believe I even had a shot, to be honest
Last thing I thought would happen was that you liked me too
Old feelings of insecurity and inadequacy swamped me when we were apart, but together, that was something amazing
So when I popped the question I was at an emotional breaking point
Even though you said no, I…
Man, all you focus on is size.
Eh, what else would you have me focus on?
Giving of one’s self? Love and happiness
And how big of a thing would that be?
The realization that you are burnt out
Oh, and you know that the whole thing is just beginning
And that’s why you feel so crusty
So butter up, buttercup, and take a deep breath
Then when you feel less crispy take another bite.
The bathroom’s walls were naked
It was screaming to be covered in porcelain
Lilly hated doing the obvious thing
Eventually, the plaster would look so much better.
Meaning to go grab some milk and bread
Allowing himself just a quick peek at one more thing
Realizing that his cart was full when he came to his senses
Knowing he should just put it all back
Except most of it was on sale
That means less to buy tomorrow?
Creamy mac and cheese gooeyness winked at her from the plate
Ordering it had been a close thing.
More often than not she would have just gotten the salad
Fork discarded, she hefted her spoon
Outside world faded away as she hefted the golden goodness into her mouth
Relishing as her tastebuds fully validated her decision
That’s when she felt the warm and fuzzies from her head to her toes.