Weeds (an acrostic poem)

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When he grew up, he thought he would be fruitful and multiply in some way.

Except everything he did seemed to go wrong in spectacular fashion.

Explosive catastrophe followed explosive catastrophe.

Destroying his ego, his love life, and his bank account.

So maybe he did live up to his initial expectation, just that he proliferated as a bunch of…

Sign (an acrostic poem)

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So, he looked for hidden meanings in everything around him

It made him paranoid he might miss something that would lead to a preventable catastrophe

Going through life on tiptoe meant that finding anything underfoot caused him to lose mental balance

Now if he only saw that earlier, he might have enjoyed what that foretold

Hubris (an acrostic poem)

Honking the horn did nothing for Martin’s blood pressure

Unless a miracle happened, he was going to be late

Being so close to his exit, but no one would let him in

Reeling from this potential catastrophe, he noticed a solution

Inserting himself forcibly in front of a BMW, daring the woman in it to hit him

See, now he was going to make it home in time for the Rick and Morty rerun